The relationship between a pastor and a team of elders can be complex, often resulting in the pastor not getting everything s/he wants. Some key insights into this dynamic include:

Role of the Pastor and Elders

• Shared Leadership: Whether or not the pastor chairs the elder board s/he does not (and should not) have unilateral control over decisions. Instead, s/he presents ideas and plans seeking to build consensus, while valuing the input and advice of the other elders. This collaborative approach means that while the pastor’s vision is important, it is not always the final word.[1] [2]
• Decision-Making Process: Many churches operate on a consensus model where decisions require agreement among elders (but hopefully not unanimity). If consensus cannot be reached, a majority vote may be used, leading to outcomes that do not align with the pastor’s preferences.[3] [4] This structure emphasizes the importance of mutual respect and accountability within church leadership.
• Unified Outcomes: Whether or not there is disagreement regarding any given outcome, the elders must speak with one voice or not at all[5] when they exit the boardroom.

Challenges in Relationships

• Conflict is Inevitable: It is good to view all conflict as an opportunity to grow closer to God and each other. Disagreements among elders are common due to differing opinions and expectations. Such conflicts can arise from simple misunderstandings, priorities, timing related to the next steps, or a lack of clarity regarding roles and responsibilities. This makes it unrealistic to expect a completely harmonious relationship over time.[6] [7]
• Feedback and Communication: Healthy relationships require open communication. Elders must provide honest feedback to the pastor about various aspects of church life. This transparency helps in addressing issues before they escalate but can also lead to situations where the pastor feels challenged or unsupported.[8] [9] It is important to ask the question, “Are we relationally unified?” at the conclusion of every elder’s meeting.

Conclusion

In summary, while a pastor often prepares the agenda for an elder meeting that includes vision-casting ideas, S/he does not always get their way due to the collaborative nature of church governance, potential conflicts among elders, and the necessity for clear communication and feedback. This structure is designed to ensure accountability and shared responsibility within church leadership, ultimately aiming for a unified direction that honors both the pastor’s vision and the collective wisdom of the elders. See Acts 15 for an example of collaborative leadership in action, especially v. 28: “For it seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us…”

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[1] peninsulabible.org/senior-pastor-role-in-relation-to-elders/?t

[2] efcaeast.com/the-pastors-most-strategic-relationship/?t

[3] peninsulabible.org/senior-pastor-role-in-relation-to-elders/?t

[4] http://www.desiringgod.org/messages/before-division-comes?t

[5] img1.wsimg.com/blobby/go/48a6315f-0689-4fbc-acd4-0cb2967d462a/downloads/Elder%20Expectations%20-%20The%20Journey.pdf?ver=1698169850593

[6] baptist21.com/blog-posts/2018/conflict-among-fellow-elders/?t

[7] blogs.efca.org/posts/what-pastors-want-from-their-elder-board?t

[8] blogs.efca.org/posts/what-pastors-want-from-their-elder-board?t

[9] efcaeast.com/the-pastors-most-strategic-relationship/?t